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7 reasons why you should never ever get a Schnauzer

Two Schnauzers in Cookie Monster costumes dog-happy
© schnauzer_ig - Instagram

So, you’re thinking of getting a Schnauzer dog? Well, we’re here to tell you in no uncertain terms that it’s a terrible idea and we have the photo evidence to prove it.

By Natasha James

Published on the 10/02/2021, 21:00

Whether you’re contemplating getting a miniature, standard or giant Schnauzer, we’re here to tell you all of the reasons why you shouldn’t.

So sit tight and listen up!

1. They’re very unattractive dogs

Yep, these furry fellas are not cute at all. Just look at this one…oh, okay, that one's *quite* cute but the other aren’t. Honest.

2. Yep, definitely not cute

Okay, so we didn’t illustrate our point with the previous post but look at this one, not adorable in the slightest…

3. They have very little personality

They’ll never make you laugh. You’ll never find them in ridiculous positions, trying to look cool with their serious little faces. Take this pup for instance, it doesn’t make us go all gooey looking at that stern little face in that ludicrous position, at all.

4. They take themselves far too seriously

Like dressing your pup up on special occasions? Well, then you can count out a Schnauzer because these dogs will never wear a costume. Ever. And, even if you find one that will, you’ll never laugh out loud at how heart-breakingly silly they look.


A post shared by Schnauzer (@schnauzer_ig)

5. They won’t do the tilty head thing

It might not be top of your list of priorities but we like our dogs to do that adorable tilty head things. A Schnauzer simply won’t do it…oh, okay, this one will but we’re sure the others don’t.

6. They won’t accompany you on snowy adventures

Oh, hmm, we seem to have found a picture of a Schnauzer doing exactly that. But, um, we’re sure there must be other reasons not to get a Schnauzer.

7. Okay, we give up, we LOVE Schanuzers and you need to get one right now


See also: 10 reasons you definitely shouldn't get a Border Terrier