I’m at my wits' end, honestly. Why? Because I fell for a cute little dog three years ago who has put me through the wringer ever since. I’m starting to wonder why I have to put up with all of this. I’m going crazy. 1. He’s constantly under our feet, watching every move we make. 2. When he’s left alone, he messes (pees and poos) even though he’s literally just been out. He scratches and ruins the door, he barks, he scratches and ruins the sofa... and that’s not all! No, he smears his poo everywhere. 3. Outside, he pulls on the lead and howls whenever he sees another dog, and if I let him off, it's impossible to catch him; the little rascal just bolts off with other dogs or other people. 4. If we’re eating something and don't give him some straight away, he goes and pees in our bed. 5. If we make the mistake of having him on the bed for a cuddle before sleep, as soon as we put him back in his basket, he waits until we’ve gone to bed to pee or poo, sometimes for no reason at all. 7. On several occasions, he has peed right where I was sitting! He does it with friends too—he'll pee right next to their feet! I know people say "a dog needs to go out, blah blah blah"... I agree! But the trouble is, when I adopted him, I wasn't working and I was only 19; I didn't think it through. Because I’m someone who respects animals, I didn't just dump him at a rescue at the first opportunity. Now, I’m a student and I work as well. I get home in the evening, I’m absolutely knackered, and I find a total mess and crap everywhere. I spend two hours cleaning up EVERY SINGLE NIGHT!!! And in the morning, if I don't watch where I step... I’ve tried every forum, website and TV show, but nothing works. I do everything I can to make sure he’s happy! I walk him, I replace his bed often, I take him to the park whenever I can; we even rented a flat with a terrace just to make up for the fact that I have less time because of work. What more can I do? I go to bed, then get up for a drink and find a total disaster! He was out on the terrace barely an hour ago! What the hell is his problem? I haven't got the budget for a behaviourist and I’m just exhausted. I don’t want to give up on my dog, but at the same time, he’s making my life a misery.
Translated from French
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I'm having some trouble with my dog. Unlike the lady mentioned, I play with my dog every single day. I even tried a 21-day training challenge I found online, but it didn't really achieve much. Aside from 'sit' and 'lie down', he just doesn't listen at all. We go for a walk for about 30 minutes a day during the week and an hour at the weekend. But he nips me under the table until I lose my temper and send him out. He goes mental when I wipe the table with a tea towel, shake a bottle, or even when I'm painting. To be honest, I think my dog is just a bit thick.
Is this a joke, I hope?! 30 minutes a day is nowhere near enough! I walk mine for 2 and a half hours every day and 3 to 3 and a half hours at the weekend, otherwise he definitely lets me know it's not enough. Get off your backside—you shouldn't have got a dog if you're only going to take it out for 30 minutes...
I'm having some real trouble with my dog. Unlike the lady mentioned, I play with my dog every single day. I even did a 21-day training challenge by a well-known professional, but it didn't really achieve much. Apart from "sit" and "down", he doesn't listen at all. We go for walks for about 30 mins a day during the week and for an hour at the weekend. But he keeps biting me under the table until I lose my temper and put him out in the garden. He goes absolutely mental when I'm wiping the table with a cloth, shaking a bottle, or painting a canvas. In my opinion, my dog is just completely thick.
Sounds like a bored dog. He needs walks with other dogs and plenty of off-lead time in the countryside with his owner to satisfy his natural instinct for ‘freedom’.
Drey333, as far as I’m concerned, I don’t agree with you not agreeing (a bit of a tongue-twister that! ^^). She says "we rented a flat with a terrace just to make up for the fact that I have less time because of work" so, logically, there's a lack of availability, added to the hyper-attachment (I agree with you there ^^) and some poor training at the start, plus Sunshiiine being there constantly because she wasn't working back then...
My advice would be to start everything again from scratch; forget the dog's age, act as if you've only just got him and go back to basics with his training from square one. Take him out as often as possible, give him heaps of praise when he does his business outside (really make a big fuss of him, it’ll encourage him to keep doing it outside) but there's no point telling him off when you get back home. Teach him not to get on the bed, do some exercises (sit, lie down, stay, give paw...) even if he already knows the commands. Dogs always love interacting with their owners, and you could even teach him some new tricks...
Thank you so much for your valuable advice.
Five hours a day isn't too bad at all! He should be able to cope. I hadn't realised that, so with a few exercises, things should work themselves out. It depends on your level of commitment—perhaps your partner could get involved too? Work on the bond you have with your dog as well. Taking him on holiday is a great way to spend quality time together, but be careful when you get back; he won't understand why you're with him 24/7 and then suddenly gone again!! It’ll be confusing for him. Spend time with him, but also make sure he can settle on his own. Start with just a few minutes and build up to a few hours; you can even just go into a different room so he gets used to being by himself 😉
WARNING, your pooch is sounding the alarm! All this bad behaviour is a cry for help. You love your dog, so I know this is hard for you, but a dog just can't stay cooped up all day with nothing to do. As mentioned in the previous posts, a dog needs physical exercise and mental stimulation; dogs have needs and instincts that are essential to their well-being. If we don't respect those needs and don't respect the dog, we pay the price, but please don't tell him off—he won't understand. All this behaviour is just his way of getting your attention, and it's clearly the only way he's found!!!!
What's your schedule exactly? Is there anyone nearby who can help, even just for a few hours a week? Do you live in a flat or a house? You mentioned you can't afford to hire a pro, which I totally get, but either way, if you don't have the time to work with your dog, any professional advice won't stick unless you actually take the time to apply it!!! Be careful with coercive methods—they could make things worse and damage the bond you have with your pooch. Things are becoming unbearable for both of you now, so personally, I think you've only got two choices: either you start putting in the time he needs... Take a moment to think if you really want to keep your pooch and commit to him. I might be able to help you for free, as I need cases to practice on. I'm currently looking for three dogs with training issues, so I can see if your situation fits into my practical assessment. If you can spare a few minutes, I can send you a short questionnaire via email and maybe help you out from there! I'm still in training, so obviously it's free of charge and no guarantees! lol
Best, Joane
Hi, first of all, thanks for your reply. Yes, I absolutely want to keep my dog and I'm actually taking him away for a fortnight in the sun to get off to a fresh start... I work part-time and so does my partner, so I'd say he's left alone on average for less than 5 hours a day, 4 days a week. I don't tell him off anymore because I've realised it doesn't solve anything, but I do sometimes end up in tears lol if I'm too exhausted. Yes, I'm happy to take you up on that offer; I'll send you my email address in a PM.
Thanks
Best
Yeah, fair enough, it could well be a bit of separation anxiety and hyper-attachment. But honestly, trying to "practise detachment" like you said, when she already has so little time to spend with her dog and he’s apparently left on his own so much anyway... I don't really see how she’s meant to manage that! Right? Definitely agree on the training side of things though. That site is great, I’ll keep it handy. Cheers.