Six months since she passed away

Hello. Losing your baby is an inconsolable pain. I went through it 4 months ago now and the void is still there; I’m still crying and the absence is just terrible. Everything reminds me of him. He was my life. He was with me for 15 long years and I still have this constant ache in my heart. I miss him so much. I’d also like to get another cat for the one who’s left behind and who is also suffering from the loss of his mate, but it’s so hard for me to give love to another cat. I feel like I’d be forgetting him.

Good evening. My cat passed away nearly six months ago. I’ve posted before about the incredible bond we had, and right after she died I talked about the shock of it all (I was with her when she passed and it was very traumatic)... I felt like I couldn’t really talk to anyone about her, because I felt judged or like they were fed up with me talking about the "past"... even though she was the one thing keeping me going. Anyway... I’ve found so much support here and I want to thank those people if they’re reading this. :) I was slowly getting ready to adopt a new cat, or maybe even two, from a rescue centre, especially since I had a two-week period where I didn’t cry and thought I was over the worst of it, but I’m not. I miss her constantly; I cry until I’m physically sick. When I look at the cats and kittens in rescues, I think of her, of her possibly being reincarnated, and sometimes I just close the page and want to shut myself away with my memories. I haven’t even moved her bed yet. Because of all this, I don’t know if I’m ready for a new cat (I’m scared I won’t love them enough), but at the same time, I miss having a cat around so much. I actually got my last one before I’d finished grieving for the one before her, who I also adored (that was also about six months later), and it turned out to be wonderful, so I just don't know... I’m not sure what you all think. 🤦 When I had to have my cat put to sleep at the emergency vet, I felt so guilty and had so many unanswered questions. I contacted a medium who specialises in pets that have passed away and it was a real balm for my aching heart. Hang in there, it’s just so hard.

Good evening, I'm so sorry for the loss of your cat; it’s something you never really get over. My heart goes out to you. I lost my own cat seven years ago now and I’ll never forget them. It took me a long time to get another cat, but I’ve got two now—though I haven't forgotten the one who’s gone. I really do understand how you’re feeling. Stay strong through this difficult time. And yes, do get another cat whenever you feel ready; they won’t replace your girl because every cat is unique and has their own personality. Sending you lots of strength, my thoughts are with you.

I’m still sleeping with the blanket my cat was put to sleep on two months ago. I’ve since adopted two 4-month-old kittens and it’s helped me ever so much. I’ll never forget my 14-year-old girl; when she passed away, a part of me went with her. For a few weeks I wasn’t sleeping well, I was constantly thinking about her... but since I adopted the new ones, it’s helped a lot. Sending strength to you. People say time heals, but I really do understand – it’s so hard, especially when you feel you have to keep it to yourself because people judge you.

Hi there, every cat is different and the bond you had with your previous girl was something that built up and developed over time. You probably won't feel that same level of affection for a newcomer straight away, but there's no reason why you won't end up loving them just as much. Personally, I waited a long time (too long, over 10 years) to adopt again because I felt so guilty at the thought of "replacing" my old girl, and I was scared I wouldn't bond with a new one. But after seeing all the posts from rescue charities struggling to find adopters, and all those photos of cats and kittens rescued from the streets in such a dreadful state, I decided to adopt again. It’s been nearly 4 years since I got Yume, and I really regret waiting so long to get another cat. If anything happened to her, I’d be devastated, but I’d try to get another one as soon as possible (perhaps a senior cat next time).

Hi there, I agree with Kalou. And dwelling on your grief the way you are right now isn't doing you any good. Adopting one or two more cats won't be a betrayal; it’ll be another act of love towards some fur babies who are just waiting to find a forever home. And given how much you loved your cat, I’m certain your heart is big enough to welcome one or two new additions.