Hello,
My 8-year-old cat passed away 6 weeks ago and I just can't seem to get over it. I’m still crying every day, spending so much time dwelling on my guilt. Even though I know you can't change the past, I’m constantly playing out scenarios in my head that might have saved him.
I’ve had him since he was a tiny kitten, and he was the first and only cat I’ve ever adopted myself. Throughout his life, he had one health issue after another and so many accidents that he spent more time at the vet’s than all my parents’ cats put together.
Then, 3 years ago, I took him to the vet because he’d lost a lot of weight. She did a blood test and diagnosed him with autoimmune haemolytic anaemia and put him on steroids. The treatment was a success; he put the weight back on quickly and was back to his old self. However, he relapsed as soon as we tried to stop the steroids, so we kept him on the treatment.
Aware of the dangers of long-term steroid use, we still tried to taper the dose down as much as possible, and life went on for 3 years. We took him for his boosters at the vet every year, and since she didn't do any specific check-ups, I didn't really think twice about it.
This summer, the day before we were due to go away on holiday, I noticed he was going to the toilet very often, or maybe he was constipated—I wasn't sure. I mentioned it to the vet, who asked me to get a urine sample and gave me an appointment for the next day. We pushed back our holiday by two days and I took him in. According to the tests, he had a UTI with blood and crystals in his urine, and his bladder was badly swollen. When they weighed him, I noticed he was skin and bone, and I started blaming myself for not noticing earlier. The vet gave him an anti-inflammatory jab, one for pain relief, and another one for something else I can't recall. She prescribed an anti-spasmodic, his steroids (increasing the dose), and some prescription food to dissolve the crystals.
I kept my cat with me until the following evening, making sure he ate. I didn't see any improvement, but I told myself it would take time for the meds to kick in. Then I left him with the friends who usually look after him, as originally planned, with his medication and special food.
I was checking in regularly and apparently, he was eating, drinking, and still urinating very frequently in tiny amounts. I was a bit worried but didn't do anything.
But after a week, my friend took him to the emergency vet (my local vet apparently couldn't fit him in) because he couldn't get up anymore.
There, they found a stone (calcium oxalate, so it couldn't be dissolved) blocking his urethra, which they had to push back into the bladder. My cat was in a comatose state. They asked me if they should try everything, and I said yes. They tried to stabilise him, put him on a catheter and a drip.
