My Jack Russell is making my life a living hell

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Good evening,

I'm writing this today because I'm at my wits' end. My Jack Russell is 6 years old and he's making my life a living hell. This has been going on for about 4 years now.

When he was a puppy, he was really lovely, well-behaved and cuddly... He didn't get into as much mischief as some other Jack Russells I know. We had a very close bond; he was my little ray of sunshine (and he still is!).

Four years ago, I had some health problems that lasted for 3 years. At the start of those issues, my dog's behaviour hadn't changed, so I don't really know if it's linked or not.

It started with a growl one evening when I touched his food bowl; he didn't like it and was quite threatening. I told him off, but that was just the beginning. Bit by bit, it got worse until he started attacking me (very often). He would chase me to bite me, and I'd have to lock myself in a room to "escape" him. I know it sounds ridiculous when you say it like that, but he must have sensed my fear. I've been bitten many times; I have scars on my legs and I even had my finger sliced open, which needed stitches.

I've done everything to try and understand him; I've taken him to several vets and seen a behaviourist, but nothing helped and it's just got worse.

Despite everything, I've always been patient and I've NEVER thought about getting rid of him, even though my family and friends told me he was dangerous and that I needed to (and still need to) let him go, for my own sake but also for his. My relationship is very strained; my partner didn't want the dog anymore after he bit me right in front of him.

Our old neighbours complained about his howling; we got a note when we first moved in and then nothing. I thought it had passed, that it was just a phase at the start. In the end, the residents' association received complaints. So, I made the decision to move rather than leave my dog, because we could have stayed in that building, but only without him. To be honest, I even thought the neighbours were exaggerating because I'd never heard my Jack make noises like that.

So, we moved into a new flat, and my dog seemed more content and, above all, more relaxed. No barking, no complaints. We've been in this flat for 3 months and I finally realised this weekend that he was howling his head off whenever we weren't there. Just to be sure, I'd even closed the windows—we're on the top floor. I could hear him howling even when I was outside the building. I've felt sick about it ever since; I don't dare go out for fear of him disturbing the neighbours. I go to work with a knot in my stomach. We're happy here, the neighbours are very quiet and I'm so scared of bothering them since we're new.

(I'll post the rest in the comments)

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    Anonymous user Icon representing the flag French
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    Honestly, it’s just not sustainable anymore! You’re going to ruin your physical and mental health... loving your dog is one thing, but making yourself ill is quite another! You seem at the end of your tether, and it’s completely understandable. We’d love to be able to reassure you, but it really looks like you’ve reached the point of no return.

    As I mentioned in my previous post, unless you can overcome your fear and work incredibly hard with a good behaviourist, there’s very little chance of things changing. It’s very rare that we come to this conclusion on this forum, as we all believe in the possibility of correcting unwanted behaviour, but in this case—at least as far as I’m concerned—I don’t really see much hope for improvement until you manage to let go of that fear.

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    Kikaah
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    Leave him with a pet sitter for a week to give yourself a bit of a breather and get things back on track.

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    If he's attacking you specifically because you're scared of him, it’s going to be very difficult to turn the situation around. You would need to reach a point where you’re no longer afraid of him and can re-establish your authority! I understand how attached you are, but to be blunt, I think the best thing for both you and the dog would be to find him a new owner who is prepared to put the work into his rehabilitation. They would need real training skills—I’m not talking about someone heavy-handed or violent, obviously, but not a total pushover either! I realise that won't be easy to find, but perhaps by asking around and talking to your vet and local rescue centres, you might find someone. You could also try a Jack Russell breed-specific rescue; there’s usually one for most breeds.
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    A
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    A crate should stop him from messing where he sleeps (usually), but unless you’re leaving him in there three-quarters of the time, it’s not really a solution. A crate does have its benefits, though; it can be a safe haven for the dog if he’s anxious, but it should never be closed. The idea is that he goes in of his own accord and can come out whenever he likes. It's a place where he knows he won't be disturbed (you could even try feeding him his meals in there), a bit like a child hiding under their duvet when they’re scared of monsters. You could try setting up a little area out of the way with an open travel crate. It might help the dog, but it's not a magic fix. Actually, I stopped using the crate for that very reason because he was messing inside it and the mornings were a total nightmare—I had to clean everything (both the dog and the crate). Mind you, during the day, as soon as he did something naughty, I wouldn’t even have time to say a word before he was already in his crate, almost as if he was punishing himself.
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    A
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    Mind you, it’s just not manageable anymore. It was a work meeting. You have to realise that I actually changed jobs so I could work part-time and be at home as much as possible, just so he doesn't bother the neighbours. I was offered another part-time contract that was much more interesting, but that’ll have to be for another time. It’s getting really difficult now; I don’t get a single minute’s peace.
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    Kikaah
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    A crate should stop him from having accidents where he sleeps (usually), but unless you’re planning on keeping him in there most of the time, it’s not really a proper solution. That being said, crates do have their uses—they can act as a safe space for a dog if they’re feeling anxious. However, the door should never be shut; the whole point is that they can go in and out of their own accord. It needs to be a spot where he knows he won’t be disturbed (you could even try feeding him his meals in there), a bit like a child hiding under their duvet when they’re scared of monsters. You could try setting up a quiet little corner for him with an open travel crate. It might help him settle, but it isn’t a total fix on its own.
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    A
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    Just to give you an update on my morning, I’ve had to cancel my appointment as well as the sitter. After washing him twice last night, I woke up this morning and he was covered in wee. He’d had an accident and then just slept in it. I didn’t have time to wash him again and there was no way I was taking him in that state. Then I thought to myself that even if I’d had the time, I didn’t want him making a mess at the sitter’s. It’s not fair for her to have to deal with all that. I’m a bit gutted because I’d planned to have a bit of a breather after my appointment and pick him up late this afternoon, but oh well, I’d rather this than him ruining someone else’s flat.
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    A
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    Does he only go for you? When you leave him with someone, does he not attack the people he's staying with? Does your partner get bitten too? How does it go with him?
    He tries to go for other people, but I’m the only one he actually bites. Maybe it’s because I’m scared of him. When I was living with my mum, she was the one who’d grab him whenever he jumped at me to bite, so she isn’t afraid of him. He growls at her in a very aggressive way, but he never manages to bite her (so is it just a threat, or does she just have the reflexes to move away before he can?). It’s the same with my partner; he already tried to bite him once but again, I don’t know if he just wanted to scare him or if my partner managed to dodge the bite. Either way, he isn't scared of him either. And it’s a good thing he’s never actually bitten him, because I know for a fact he could have been very violent in return. He tells me all the time that he liked my dog at first, but now he can't stand him—that even if he were to die, it wouldn’t bother him, he might even be relieved. His words are harsh, but I know he really means them... The person who looks after him for me doesn’t really have any problems with him. She told me that once he growled at her while baring his teeth, and she was just as silly as him and growled back. He got scared and went off to his bed. But I think the fact she has a big dog must put him under a bit of pressure. Her dog is young but already twice the size of mine, so when they play, her dog usually gets the upper hand and that must intimidate him. What’s certain, anyway, is that I’m the only one he’s bitten and the only one he attacks by chasing after me to bite—but then, I’m probably also the only one who’s truly afraid of him. Mind you, even without talking about fear, everyone is wary of him. That’s why everyone I know, without exception, is advising me to get rid of him. They tell me I’m lucky he hasn’t bitten me in the face yet, but that it could happen at any moment.
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    A
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    https://www.facebook.com/theapbc/ You can find a behaviourist through here.

    I’ve just had a look at the Facebook page, I’m going to give it a proper read. Thanks!

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    A
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    To reply to @Gabyn (sorry, I can’t quite work out how to quote your message): I haven’t been back to see the behaviourist because nothing changed after the session and their advice was exactly the same as everything I’ve seen online (ignoring him, not cleaning up in front of him, etc... plus no advice at all on the fact that he can’t be left alone). I have to admit, it’s put me off behaviourists a bit as I started to think it was all a bit of a scam. Mind you, I’ve only ever seen that one. However, just before joining the forum and asking for advice (the day before), I got in touch with some vets and rescue centres to see if they had any tips or knew of any good people who could help. Actually, a vet’s receptionist gave me the number of a home-visit behaviourist and told me she was brilliant. I’ve contacted her but she hasn't called me back yet. I was going to wait about a week before trying her again, just in case she’s away on holiday. Of course I want to keep trying, the problem is my partner is at the end of his tether and I can see why. :( Also, speaking of crates, the behaviourist I saw actually made me buy a crate for him to use at night to stop him having accidents everywhere. Does that mean it wasn't necessarily a good idea?
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