I’ve got a little Golden Retriever puppy who is 3 months old. She is absolutely adorable, playful, and cuddly, but since she arrived, things haven't been as easy as I expected and I’m constantly stressed...
Everyone else loves her and I do too, but it's really tough going—it’s so much work and, above all, very stressful. Especially house training (she had free access to the outdoors at the breeder's), so I have to make sure to take her out every 2 hours and clean up any accidents in the house. On top of that, I’ve had my cat for 6 years and naturally I’m spending less time with her, which I really miss. They’re getting on okay for now, even if the puppy jumps on her from time to time; I try to make sure she stays calm around the cat.
Basically, since she’s been here, I’ve had a constant knot in my stomach and I’ve lost my appetite. I’m so worried about doing things wrong and I’ve realised just how hard it is to look after a puppy.
This wasn't an impulse buy at all. I love animals and whenever I saw dogs, I couldn't help dreaming of the day I'd have my own. I waited a year before getting her and I knew it would be hard work—some close friends went through the same thing 6 months ago! But at the moment, I feel like I’m looking after her without really loving her... and that makes me so sad. Then again, I remember when I got my cat, it felt the same; I didn't love her straight away, it took a bit of time, and today I love her to bits!
Anyway, I just hope I won't be judged. It just feels good to talk about it, to feel less alone and, most importantly, to be reassured.
Thanks, and if you have any advice, I’m all ears.
Translated from French
The forum content is sometimes translated from another language, and posts may concern countries with different animal laws. Do your research before making any decisions.
Since the forum is translated by AI, the translations may contain errors.
You should tell us a bit more about this "aggression" between the two of them.
It’s likely just a puppy looking for attention because they don’t get enough chances to let off steam with other young dogs anymore, and perfectly normal boundary-setting from the adult who has to put the untrained youngster in their place. You should let her get on with it; it’s just a normal part of an older dog’s job.
But @Kikaah is spot on: for the time being, don’t leave them together unsupervised.
When you leave them unsupervised, separate them for the time being—keep one in one room with something to keep them occupied and the other in another room. At least you’ll have some peace of mind then.
Hi, I really understand what you're going through as I’ve just adopted a new puppy and things aren't going well with my other dog at all. I’m at my wits' end and really need some help because my girl is constantly on edge. They’re both Cane Corsos; she’s 5 years old and the pup is three and a half months. There have already been a few scuffles that didn't amount to much, but I can't even go upstairs for a shower now without tethering one of them or keeping them separated. Out on walks everything is fine, but otherwise, it’s just not working. It’s really not going well at home, so I need some advice to help me de-stress because I’m constantly anxious. I’m exactly like you—I’ve been incredibly stressed since the new one arrived. Since he got here, my husband and I have been sleeping on the sofa with both of them. I don't know if it’s a lack of confidence on my part, but I would really appreciate some constructive advice to help us move forward. I want the integration to happen in the best possible way because we’re getting hardly any sleep and it’s a total nightmare. What should I do? Rehoming the puppy is out of the question. Please help me find a solution. Thanks in advance for your replies and I hope to hear from you soon.
Evening,
I’m going through this exact stage right now. I adopted a 5-month-old shepherd cross 11 days ago. I feel completely overwhelmed and exhausted by the short nights and being constantly woken up by my puppy's demands.
I’d given it a lot of thought and knew it would be a lot of work, but I didn't realise it would be quite like this. He follows me everywhere; I feel really smothered and don't have a single minute to myself anymore. I adopted him on my own.
It’s lovely reading your posts, even the older ones, to reassure myself that this should pass. But how long is it going to take..?
Hello.
We’ve just adopted a little one who’s 2 months old... and I have to admit, I’ve been feeling really anxious for the last couple of days. I’m scared I won’t be up to the task... worried my cats won't get used to him. I feel a bit lost and like my whole home has been turned upside down... even though we’d thought it through so carefully. He’s adorable and there haven't been many problems so far, he just needs heaps of attention etc... and I’m getting very little sleep because of the anxiety.
Sometimes I find myself thinking 'I can't do this'... and then the guilt kicks in. It's a bit like the baby blues, really. I was feeling quite alone, but reading your posts has made me feel much less isolated.
I feel exactly the same as you – the stress, the sleepless nights, that constant anxiety and the knot in my stomach. It’s actually making me physically ill. Even though I love him so much already and I waited years before taking the plunge, I’ve got to the point where I’m wondering if it would be better for his own sake to rehome him with someone more experienced. It’s better to do it now than in six months... but I’m so torn. He doesn’t listen to a word I say, it’s an absolute nightmare, and I feel totally out of my depth. I just don’t know what to do anymore.
Hi there. I’ve been reading through your posts from a few years back and I’m finding myself in the exact same boat today. I really need to hear about your experiences to give me a bit of a motivation boost. I spend all day looking after my little Rio, who does his business outside when I’m with him, but just as often inside as well. The first thing I do when I get up is clean... not to mention he wakes me up every morning at 5 am... I’ve got 2 kids and other "responsibilities" to deal with; I’m exhausted and I’ve already run out of patience. I’m actually crying as I write this.
Hi @Caam, are things any better? Have you moved past this stage now? We adopted Rizzly two and a half months ago (he’s four and a half months old) and I’m still going through a period of massive doubts, lots of tears, and feeling like "this dog takes up every second of my time and gives me no peace"!!
Hi @Caaam, I’m in the same boat as you. We’ve had our little girl for nine days now and I’ve been feeling really down since shortly after she arrived. I’ve had a puppy before, but it was ages ago and I’ve realised I’d forgotten so much! I’ve got my own responsibilities to deal with too, and I’m barely getting any sleep at the moment! Things are very slowly starting to improve, though. I even blurted out to my partner that I almost regretted adopting her... and I felt guilty the very next second. I had the same "blues" with my children; it lasted about three weeks and after that, it was just pure joy watching them progress and get into less mischief. I’m at the point where I breathe a massive sigh of relief when she finally falls asleep... but if I’ve forgotten those difficult times with my first dog, it must be because they didn't last long. Hang in there!
Hi everyone. I’ve been reading through your posts from a few years ago and I’m in the exact same boat today. I really need to hear about your experiences to give me a bit of a motivation boost. I spend all day looking after little Rio, who goes to the toilet outside when I’m with him, but just as often indoors too. The first thing I do when I get up is clean up... not to mention the fact he wakes me up at 5am every morning. I’ve got two kids and other responsibilities as well; I’m exhausted and I’ve already run out of patience. I’m actually in tears writing this.
