I’ve had a female Spaniel-Setter cross for over two years now. She’s four years old and we got her from the RSPCA; like many rescues, she has a bit of a troubled past...
My partner and I wanted a second dog, a male of the same Spaniel-Setter cross, and we’ve had him for five days now. He’s two months old and is absolutely full of beans! ;) (We spoke to the vet beforehand and they recommended a male puppy, given her temperament.)
When she’s in the house, she gives him such dirty looks and won't budge from the sofa (I know, I know...). As soon as he comes near to play or even just walks past, she growls at him, and she’s stopped moving around the house like she used to. She’s really on edge. On Sunday evening, she even lunged at him; he wasn't hurt – she just nipped him – but we’re quite scared now.
When we’re out on walks, she just ignores him and moves away as soon as he approaches.
Thanks in advance for any advice or for sharing your own experiences.
Translated from French
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Hi, I'm having the same problem with my adult male and my Golden Retriever puppy. I just wanted to know if your issue ever got sorted out? How did you manage it and how long did it take? Thanks for your reply, it would really help us out...
This behaviour is pretty much normal. Your girl has been in her home for quite a while now; it’s her territory and she’s had her owner all to herself until now. You mentioned she’s had a bit of a rough past, too, which will definitely play a part depending on what she’s been through.
The new little one is a puppy, and instinctively, I think you’re probably drawn to him a bit more. Puppies need a lot of fuss and attention; even if you don't mean to do it, your older dog will sense it.
You need to give her some time, but also make sure you show her you’re still there for her. Try not to be too harsh with her—quite the opposite, actually. She needs to feel that you love her just as much as before.
Time is usually a great healer, giving everyone a chance to settle into the new situation. Mind you, it’s true that sometimes it isn't enough; some dogs just aren't meant to live together, just like some people don't get along. That said, I really think she just needs some time to adjust.
Nioko, it’s only been five days, so you’re going to need a bit of patience for things to improve. I think if your dog isn't biting him or attacking him aggressively yet, that’s already a positive sign.
Whatever you do, DON'T tell her off when the puppy gets near her. You’ll only make matters worse and end up causing a real conflict that could be even more serious. Rolling onto the back is a submissive position; it's not appropriate for this situation. Besides, a dog will usually roll onto her back on her own (like Gucci does, even though I’ve never forced her into that position), but it’s not up to you to put her like that.
You’ve just got to let them get on with it... while keeping an eye on things...
When the puppy goes up to her, let him be and talk to your girl at the same time...
"Look [dog's name]... XXXX is a good boy, yes, he’s just coming to say hello... no, no growling..." in a gentle voice...
As for mealtimes, she’ll get the hang of it...
When I’m dog-sitting and have a few dogs staying, some of them are used to "free-feeding" all day at home because they’re the only pet.
Here, I put their bowls down and keep watch... then after a while, I pick them up...
I’ll offer it to them again at lunchtime if they haven't finished.
Within two days, they’ve understood and follow the same routine as all the others.
And remember, you’ve only had the pup for five days... with some patience and plenty of love... everything will settle down.
We’ve been putting their bowls down at the same time and everything, but before the puppy arrived, our dog didn't have set mealtimes. Her bowl was left on the floor all day and she’d just graze whenever she felt like it, but now that things have changed for her, she’s eating less!
Luckily, I’m going to be at home for the next three months, so I’m hoping things will get a lot better...!
So if I’ve understood correctly, I shouldn't be putting my dog on her back, and I should be the one to move the male away myself?
And since that incident, we’ve been telling her off whenever he gets near her because we're worried about another attack...!
Thanks p'titefleur
Gwash95: our dog isn't particularly sociable on walks or at home, but she isn't normally aggressive. That’s why the vet suggested a male puppy of a similar or identical breed rather than a female puppy. We did do our research beforehand! Thanks again ;)
When they first met, it would have been better to do it in a neutral spot (like a park). That way, you could have let them off the lead to get to know each other properly. Your dog has been the only pet for a long time, so this is all new to her, though if she’s a rescue, she would have lived with other dogs before. It’s important to let her growl, as long as things don’t escalate. Don't spend more time with the puppy than with her; in fact, if she’s the jealous type, give her more attention at the start while she settles in. It’ll take time for her to accept him, so you’ve got to be patient.
This is usually what happens when the introduction is a bit too rushed—just opening the front door and plonking the puppy down. As I said, meeting on neutral ground like a park would have been better. She wouldn’t have felt the need to protect her territory like she does at home. When she’s on the sofa growling, she’s probably just making it clear that it’s HER spot.
How do you react when she starts growling? As long as it doesn’t turn aggressive and she isn’t lunging at the puppy, there’s no need for punishment. Instead, try distracting her with a treat.
And besides, socialisation is something that can be taught... In my view, it’s down to the owner to train their dog to be or become sociable... of course, there will always be exceptions with some dogs...
