Hi everyone, I’ve just joined this forum because I lost my dog this Saturday, 29/01/22. A little 16-year-old Chihuahua. I loved him more than anything in the world; I had to have him put to sleep, and it was the worst day of my life. Now, I’m not afraid of anything anymore, because after the courage it takes to do that, I honestly wouldn’t care if I died. My pain is immense. He was my little boy and we had such an incredible bond. I’m crying every minute, every second; I can’t accept that he’s no longer by my side, it hurts too much. He’d gone deaf and blind and two of his legs were paralysed. We kept him going regardless; we’d set him up in a little baby playpen and he was doing alright, he was happy enough despite everything. But over the last four days we had to take him to the vet several times; he became paralysed in all four legs this time and he was crying non-stop, day and night. He was suffering because he couldn’t sit up anymore, he was in pain... in the end, we had to make the decision to have him put to sleep. I held him in my arms until his very last breath; I didn’t leave him for a single second during the procedure, even though I felt like I might collapse myself, but I stayed strong for him until the end. I kept him in my arms. I can’t seem to get over the grief; I keep replaying that awful moment in my head over and over, wondering if I made the right choice... I’m just lost. My grief is so heavy, people just don't understand. I talk to him all the time, even though he's gone. 😞
Translated from French
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You’ve come to the right place to talk about it. Your little one knows how much you loved them, especially after all the time you spent together. It’s a stage you have to go through, so just focus on what you’re feeling. Try to forgive the people who don’t understand; it’ll do you the world of good. This forum helped me get through this ordeal by hearing everyone’s stories. You’ll be alright, you’ll see. Please don’t hesitate to let us know how you’re doing.
Thank you, Sandrine. It’s good to know there are people who understand, even if it takes losing a beloved dog to truly get it—they give so much love, it’s just heartbreaking. PS: I’m not sure if this is the right place to reply, I’m struggling a bit with the site.
Thanks Sandrine, it’s a comfort to know there are people who understand, even if it takes losing a beloved dog to truly get it. They give so much love, it’s just heartbreaking. PS I’m not sure if this is the right place to reply, I’m struggling a bit with the site.
You're right, the void they leave is unbearable and so hard to cope with—that’s an understatement. People and even my family just don't get it, which is why I’ve come to this forum to talk about him and find others who understand what I’ve been going through this past month.
Hi there,
I completely understand your situation; only those who are heartless wouldn't get it. And I’m sorry if that includes your family. I know exactly how it feels, as I lost my 15-year-old Golden Retriever last March. It’s been so difficult; only this past weekend, I burst into tears looking at photos of him. You’ll grieve in your own time. Don’t rush yourself. To give yourself some comfort, why not set up a little memorial corner with a photo of him and his favourite toy? You’ll find it really helps. Express yourself and let it all out—it’s only human!!! It will take time to go through the various stages of grief. Hang in there; our babies have gone to heaven, to the Rainbow Bridge. I’m here if you ever want to chat!
Sandrine
Thank you so much, Sandrine. It’s a real comfort, if I can put it that way, to know there are people who understand what it’s like to lose your beloved dog. I thought I was the only person in the world going through this.
Yes, it’s true, the void they leave is unbearable and so hard to cope with – and that’s an understatement. People and even my family don’t understand, which is why I’m on this forum, to talk about him and find people who understand what I’ve been going through for the last month.
Good evening,
I completely understand your situation; only those who are emotionally cold could fail to understand. And I’m sorry if that includes your family. I know exactly what it’s like, as I lost my 15-year-old Golden last March. It’s been very hard – only this past weekend I burst into tears looking at photos of him. You will grieve in your own time. Don’t force it; to help comfort yourself, why not set up a little memorial with a photo of him and his favourite toy? You’ll find it really helps. Let it all out, express yourself – it’s only human! It takes time to go through the different stages of grief. Hang in there; our babies have gone to heaven, to the Rainbow Bridge. I’m here if you want to chat!
Sandrine
Yes, it’s true, the emptiness is unbearable and so hard to live with—and that’s an understatement. People and my family just don’t understand, which is why I’m on this forum, to talk about him and find people who get what I’ve been going through this past month.
Good evening,
I completely understand your situation; only those with no heart could fail to understand. And I’m sorry if that includes your family. I know exactly what it’s like, as I lost my 15-year-old Golden Retriever last March. It has been so tough—only this past weekend, I burst into tears just looking at photos of him. You will grieve in your own time. Don't push yourself; to help find some comfort, why not set up a little memorial corner with a photo of him and his favourite toy? You’ll find it really helps. Let it all out, cry if you need to—it’s only human!!! It will take time to go through the different stages of grief. Hang in there; our babies have gone to heaven, over the Rainbow Bridge. I’m here if you ever want to chat!
Yes, it’s true that missing him is awful, it’s so hard to cope with, and that’s putting it mildly. People and my family don’t understand, which is why I’m on this forum to talk about him and find people who understand what I’ve been going through for the past month.
Hello! I completely understand your pain because I’m going through the exact same thing. I had to take my Beagle, Granola, to the vet to put an end to her suffering. She had a bladder tumour that just kept getting worse despite the medication (she couldn't pass water anymore and her appetite was fading; she had to wear nappies because the meds caused an overflow of urine she was able to release). Her appetite dropped so much that her last meal was just 4 or 5 peanuts and a bit of cheese—it was heartbreaking to see. She ate them so weakly and always walked with a hunched back, as if she were trying to ease the pain or discomfort.
So, we had to take her to the vet, knowing it was the last time I’d ever see her. Once we got there, it really hit me that she only had moments left to live, and I got a massive lump in my throat. The vet was very compassionate, but the grief just kept getting stronger. Granola was just staring straight ahead, and not knowing what she was feeling at that moment is just agonising. She fell asleep in my arms after the first injection, then I laid her on her side for the second one so she could finally go... I watched her take her last breaths and then she was gone.
It’s been two days now and my world has completely fallen apart. It hit me like a ton of bricks the next morning when I saw her bed was empty, even though the blankets still smelled of her. Everything inside me has collapsed; it feels so empty, like a total wreck, and I feel like I'll never get over it because it hurts so much. It’s only been two days, but a part of me knows that if I let myself sink into this pain, I’ll never get back up... I realise I’m going to have to start a healing process to get better because I want to pull through this. It means going through almost unbearable sadness, the anger that will come soon, then understanding, and finally acceptance. It’s called resilience, and I don’t want to end up completely broken—it’ll just take time.
Just tell yourself that if you hadn't done it, her suffering would probably have been much worse, and no good owner wants to leave their dog in such pain. Putting a pet to sleep is an act and a decision that requires real courage and inner strength, forcing you to face the very thing that hurts the most. I think you’d feel even worse if you hadn’t taken them to the vet for that final time, because watching your dog fade away without going to the vet would make you feel like you’d done nothing for them, which isn't the case. Take care of yourself.
Hello, my sweet girl, who was 15 years and 10 months old, had been suffering from mouth cancer for a month. She was on treatment, though it was no miracle, just for her quality of life. She had arthritis and was on supplements to help, but her tumour had grown so much. She started bleeding and could barely eat; she was suffering too much and it killed me to see her like that. I had to put her to sleep. She passed away in my arms. It’s been two days; she was my baby, born right here at home. It was my first time experiencing anything like this, it's so hard and the pain just stays with you. There's such a void; she followed me everywhere and slept with me. I cry for her every single day. It’s an absolute nightmare going through this. Best of luck to everyone else in the same boat as me.
Hi, I lost my dog a month ago too and it’s been absolute hell. All the memories, his little face, if I can put it that way... it’s just hell. I’m completely devastated. I’ve even moved out of my flat because there were just too many memories. I’m even on antidepressants now; I really don’t see how I’m ever going to get over this.
