My dog pees when he's been told off

Positive reinforcement is all well and good, but I think you’re exaggerating a bit, Caroline, when you claim we shouldn’t even use "no". If you catch your dog chewing the curtains, do you just ignore him completely? So you just let him get on with it? That’s the best way to make him think, "Okay, this is allowed."

I actually think that ignoring a dog to show they’ve done something wrong is very confusing for them. After all, you can’t give your dog 100% of your time. For example, if you’re busy cooking, reading a book, or whatever else—not to mention when you leave the room or head off to work—what is your dog supposed to understand when you’re "ignoring" him then? That he’s done something bad?

You say that the biggest punishment for a dog is being ignored.

A dog shouldn't feel punished just because we’re busy with something else; he needs to be able to settle down in his own space without getting anxious while waiting for his owner to be free.

When my Cocker Spaniel used to nick my slipper, if I had just taken it away without a word, he’d never have understood it was off-limits and would have kept doing it. He’s only four and a half months old now, but he’s only touched them twice, and that was two months ago. I told him "no" while taking it back and then offered him one of his own toys instead. "No" works and it isn't traumatising.

You can perfectly well say "no" to a dog and show you’re unhappy; the main thing is to praise him the moment he stops the unwanted behaviour. The telling-off shouldn't last long, because otherwise, the stress of the reprimand can lead to an accidental wee. Don’t scold him for the accident either; he can’t help it. After that, you can distract him by playing with him, as he’ll have already forgotten what he did wrong. Your pup will associate your displeasure with certain actions and your good mood with the rest of the time; he’ll want to please you and will give up those bad habits.

In any case, you shouldn't scold him too often, as he could develop a phobia if he’s a sensitive soul.

Sorry, I’ve just realised this is an old post, but never mind—now that I’ve written my reply, I’ll post it anyway.

When she was a puppy, my dog used to pee whenever we told her off...

But she had real anxiety issues... She’d even pee when we shouted (like if you stubbed your little toe on the kitchen table)...

So it wasn’t hard to work out that it was her anxiety and fears making her do it.

The day we stopped telling her off and just started ignoring her instead, it all stopped.