Yesterday, I had my cat put to sleep and I'm full of regret. He was ill (liver cancer) and hadn't been eating for a long time. He'd stopped eating altogether for a week, but before that, he was barely eating anything – less than half an ounce a day. He was still drinking a tiny bit though. But he was starting to get really weak. Even so, he'd still respond when I spent time with him; he loved it when I brushed him. The day before yesterday, he was walking very slowly and couldn't get up on the sofa by himself anymore. I feel terrible for cutting his life short, even though I know there was no hope for him. I could have waited a bit longer. Doing it yesterday felt too soon. I feel so guilty about making that decision. Has anyone else been through something similar?
Translated from French
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Thank you all for your kindness and empathy; hearing all this is really helping me, so thank you again from the bottom of my heart. You have no idea how much you’re easing my heartache. I woke up this morning still feeling sad, of course, but a little more at peace than yesterday. It’s a slow journey. I’ve been thinking back to moments from his last morning with me, and it’s true that he couldn’t even stay on his feet anymore. He’d get up for two seconds to have a drink and then lie straight back down wherever he was. Just like all our pets, he didn’t deserve to suffer. I miss him and I know I always will.
@Kalou124
It always happens too fast, of course. Even when you’re expecting it after the diagnosis. You’re just never 100% ready for it, that’s for sure.
It’s completely normal to feel guilty; we all do when we find ourselves having to make that final, irreversible decision. But please remind yourself that there was nothing more you could have done to save them, and that you gave them the greatest act of love they could have asked for. You spared them from suffering and they passed away peacefully, surrounded by all your love.
Wishing you strength during this incredibly difficult time. Time will eventually ease your grief, and though you will never forget them, they will always stay in your heart.
Cancer isn't the first thing that comes to mind when a cat is being sick. By the time symptoms or abnormalities show up, it’s often too late, and even when a tumour is caught early, there isn't always something that can be done. As the liver is a vital organ, I don't think he could have been saved. Once again, rest assured that you acted with dignity.
Hi Grumeau,
You’re quite right. It all happened so quickly; he was only diagnosed at the end of August. By yesterday, his lymph nodes had already swollen significantly; you could really feel them. It’s true, we can sometimes forget just how fragile they are. He’d started vomiting back in June, but I’d mistakenly put it down to the plants he sometimes nibbled on. A terrible mistake—if only I’d taken him to the vet sooner. I first took him to a vet in mid-July. They initially diagnosed him with pancreatitis, and his condition just kept getting worse from there. It wasn't until I took him to another vet that they told me it was liver cancer, not pancreatitis. Maybe he could have been saved. But by that stage, it was already too late. Thank you for your support.
There’s not much to add to Kalou’s message really. I also had to have a cat put to sleep at just a year old; he’d had a rough start in life despite several rescue attempts. You shouldn't feel guilty — vets don't do it for no reason, and cancer is a real *******. It’s not your fault and it was the right thing to do.
It just reminds us how fragile they are and how important it is to spend time with them, as none of us are here forever. Wishing you strength during this difficult time.
Hi Kalou,
Thanks for getting back to me. Your words really mean a lot. That’s exactly it – I didn't want to wait until he was in pain. His condition was definitely starting to deteriorate. It was so heartbreaking to see him like that, no longer being able to eat despite wanting to, and not grooming himself anymore. It’s silly, but I keep telling myself I could have waited a few more days, even though deep down I know it wouldn't have helped. It’s an awful thing to have to make that choice, having the power of life and death over an innocent soul. I miss him so much. If you don't mind me asking, what were the first signs of suffering you noticed in your cat?
