How to get a cuddly kitten?

Pilume: There’s nothing unusual about that. Just as some cats are real "Velcro cats", others are very independent. It all comes down to their personality.

My Zoé has that kind of independent streak; when you approach her and reach out to stroke her, you get the impression she feels threatened and she walks away because she doesn't want to be touched (she came from a rescue she joined at 3 months old, but we don't know if she was mistreated in the past). Even with my other two cats, she doesn't interact with them much—she’s the loner of the group. But every now and then she’ll come looking for a fuss; she hops onto my lap, purrs and rubs against me, it's her little evening ritual. Then, when she's had enough, she gets up and wanders off as if to say "Right, you've had your cuddles, now I'm off." But she’s never once been aggressive (except with Lucky when he first arrived, which is normal).

On the other hand, I’ve got Meryl who is a total Velcro cat, always following us everywhere and demanding cuddles. This is despite the fact that she was very aggressive at the start (she’s a rescue who was given to us, she didn't understand what was happening to her), and she still hisses and growls when she’s annoyed.

So, whether a cat is affectionate or not has nothing to do with aggression; it’s just a matter of personality.

She’s 3 months old and she’s been here for nearly 2 weeks now.

But then, I’ve got friends who’ve just got a kitten that’s really cuddly.

Hi there,

It’s perfectly normal – kittens are meant to be playful. If you want a calm and cuddly pet, you’re better off adopting an adult cat (and even they still need their playtime).

There aren’t many ways around it in your case: play with your kitten and let him come to you. He’ll let you know when he’s in the mood for a fuss.

(By the way, how old is he? At what age was he weaned?)