Cat attacking my children

I’m at home all day, and he’s actually got quite used to it; if I go into another room he follows me, and if he can’t, he miaows to be with me.

My son is sometimes a bit rough without meaning to be, but he absolutely loves the little kitty. We’ve made it very clear to him that he has to be gentle. But between the two of them, it’s... how can I put it... it never ends. It's either the cat jumping on my son to play but hurting him, or my son chasing after him...

We play quite often since he’s playing practically all day whenever he’s not asleep.

But he always ends up attacking my hands.

Personally, I trim as much as possible (well, for my first cat I don't really need to anymore), but of course, never touch the pink/red part—the quick.

When he gets back, he’s desperate to play and burn off some steam, so I’d say he’s just a bit of a handful rather than being spiteful. I see the nipping as more of a "claiming" thing, a way of being really close, like a baby saying, "Mummy, Mummy, I’m here, look at me, stay with me." I read on the forum that it’s a bit like a carry-over from nursing. But he needs to learn not to hurt you... it’s all part of the training process.

As for teaching him not to scratch or bite, I’m not entirely sure, as I was lucky enough to get Myrtille once she’d been properly weaned (she was raised with her brother and sister). She retracts her claws automatically when she comes near... unless she gets too overexcited and forgets herself. You should ask someone who has experience raising kittens.

I reckon he’s just scared of the kids; if they’re noisy, that’s only natural. At two and a half, children are bouncy and can be accidentally rough, so the kitten gets frightened—there’s no malice in it. How does your son behave around the kitten?

You shouldn't just give him toys; you need to play *with* him. A ball of wool is actually really dangerous—he could swallow the thread, choke, or get all tangled up in it. Instead, tie a toy to the end of some string (it’ll save your hands!) and get him to run around after it, letting him catch it every so often so he can enjoy the "win". Every time he goes for someone—pop—get the toy on the string out, make him run and jump about a bit, hide the toy... You really need to engage with him, not just leave him to it with his toys. My kitten especially loves toys with little bells or ones that squeak, but you’ll have to see what yours prefers. (Don’t forget to take the string off when you leave him alone!)

How much time a day do you spend playing with him?

Hang in there! I’m sure he just wants to fit in with the family; he just doesn't know how to go about it yet!

He’s just a baby! He’s not being spiteful or violent out of malice. If he wasn’t properly weaned by his mum and stayed with his littermates, he simply hasn’t learnt how to keep his claws in. He’s scratching and biting just to play, without realising that he’s actually hurting you.

You need someone to explain how to teach him some manners yourself because you’re right, it’s no reason to just throw him out. Of course, that doesn’t mean you shouldn't keep him away from the children for safety in the meantime.

Cat behaviourists are a real thing and can definitely help. Alternatively, putting him in contact with an older cat who can teach him how to behave could also do the trick.

Lastly, I’ve noticed with my own kitten that the more worked up we get (when she’s being naughty, like pouncing on our faces to play, for example), the more aggressive she becomes herself. So I’d say: don’t shout, definitely don't hit him, and try not to get cross. Instead, redirect the kitten's attention to a toy or something else. When you’re at your wits' end and tension is high (because he’s scratched you again or you don’t have time to play and he’s being persistent), shut him away for a few minutes to let him have his "mad five minutes" on his own—ideally somewhere where he has all his things.

Cats aren’t spiteful; they have needs and requirements just like any other living thing! It’s when those needs aren’t understood that things go wrong. Give this baby a chance to learn how to behave properly.

I’d advise you to either see a pro or just get rid of it.

I’m shocked that you’re saying this cat is like a baby... Just imagine if it scratched your children's eyes... the consequences would be devastating.

I’m not sure if cat behaviourists actually exist, but I wouldn’t be surprised if they did.

I’ve had three cats. Cats can be vicious, and when they scratch, it’s nothing like a dog. It slices right through the skin.

Please, put your children before the cat.

PS: If a cat behaviourist manages to solve this, or if you manage it yourself, I’d be curious to know how you did it...